happiness.

just a single touch,
your hand on my shoulder,
or on my back.

made my skin tingle,
it was like nothing,
ive ever felt before.

a smile was on your face and mine,
we were fine with being alone,
or in the presence of someone else.

walking through the barely lit woods,
or sitting on a bench,
as long as im with you,
im perfectly happy.

brother?

it wasnt too long ago that you were caught,
it wasnt too long ago when you bought your first act of freedom,
it wasnt too long ago when you still stayed at home at night.

back when i still heard your jokes,
back when i was still a kid,
back when we could still hang out in the same places.

with that first act of freedom,
you ran away from those who didnt care,
and those who truly did.

you gained bad habits,
you gained new friends,
you lost a family,
you lost a sister.

its a rarity that i ever see you,
ten minutes here or there,
when will i have a brother again?

not wishing anymore.

awake in a room that isnt mine,
thinking of people that wont be mine,
wishing actions that wont be mine,
having feelings that arent mine.

i gave up wishing long ago,
on stars, numbers, and people too.

i used to wish for him,
for a conversation,
for some answers,
for some reciprocation.

it never came true,
no, it did not.

and that is why i gave up wishing,
by my life is dreary yet.